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Do you think marriage is a gift from God? I believe! Then why do some creepy things destroying the beauty of this divine institution? Is it due to over expectations or lack of faith? Or do we consider marriage so lightly which was the desire of God for man? I can say that no marriage is flawless from the day one, and the beauty of marriage can be related to the taste of wine, it tastes better with age and so with marriage. But there are tough marriages, painful to handle and hard to get along. I used to ponder about it, so many times, but never found a convincing answer. Still, I want to trust God even in all my unanswered questions and the riddles of this life. So, what do you think, do flawless marriage exist?
Before diving deep, shall we mull over the life of the St. Monica of Hippo. In short, St. Monica, had a terrible marriage life with an unfaithful husband who was a non-believer and the owner of terrible temper. She had to go through so many sufferings in her life. But she succeeded in showing the unfailing love of God to her husband and eventually changed him. It is hard for me to imagine myself in her situation. She knew Christ and the way of the cross; she decided to travel through it. Her days on this earth was mostly weary and troublesome, she wept for her family to prevent their lives from eternal destruction and God answered her prayer.
The life of St. Monica shows us hardened hearts can be changed by the power of prayer. It also reminds that transformation takes place not in our time, but according to the perfect time of God. Maybe this story could be pretty outdated for the time we live, but I believe the word of God is same yesterday, today, and forever. What could we do then? Should we give up when the marriage seems difficult to manage or should we wait a little longer in faith and perseverance?
When I started my marriage life, I expected arguments to happen as we are two distinct individuals having different perspectives. But it was my husband who reminded me to seek for the grace of God if argument persists. And I took his word as I wanted to build a Godly home with peace and love. All I did was “Pray”. I never consulted anyone, never shared my feelings with anyone, but I knew only Jesus could erase all the negativities of my life, and make me a better wife, for my husband, in His will. I had so many shortcomings, and it was hard for me to be a wife who obeys the word of God. But I was determined, I prayed and decided to be a submissive wife. Now, I could say that God restored my family life with joy, peace and love.
Jesus never took years to change my family life, but He changed my life when I decided to obey the word of God. It is we who disobey and disregard the divine wisdom of God and follow the ways of the world. Nowadays, couples throw away the vows spoken in the presence of God, and what does God say about walking away from marriage? It is high time to think who we regard the most- ourselves or the Holy God. We need to obey the commandments of God if we love Him. And how can we say we love Him without obeying His commandments? We might be weak vessels, but His grace is enough for us to sustain us through all the trials.
The beauty of marriage is in the perfect submission of husband and wives to the word of God. And what a glorious life it is when the husband loves the wife as Christ loves the church, and wives respect the husband as she would do to the Lord. This is the life God planned and desired for your life, which is only possible in fellowship with Him.
There is no flawless marriage… But there are guidelines in the bible, to change faulty marriages to flawless marriages by the love of Christ.
The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” (Genesis 2:18)
That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. (Genesis 2:24)
A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. (Proverbs 31:10)
She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. (Proverbs 31:12)
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She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants. She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings, she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. (Proverbs 31: 18)
She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. (Proverbs 31: 20)
When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. (Proverbs 31:21)
She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. (Proverbs 31:25)
She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. (Proverbs 31:26)
She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. (Proverbs 31:27)
Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. (Ecclesiastes 4:12)
Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate. (Mark 10:9)
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. (Ephesians 5:21-23)
Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behaviour of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. (1 Peter 3:1,2)
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. (Ephesians 5:25-27)
However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:33)
Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and nagging wife. (Proverb 21:19)
Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. (1 Peter 4:8)
Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them. (Colossians 3:19)
And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. (Colossians 3:14)
“The man who hates and divorces his wife,” says the LORD, the God of Israel, “does violence to the one he should protect,” says the LORD Almighty. So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful. (Malachi 2:16)
I believe the word of God can guide us to have a beautiful married life in Christ. What do you think? Feel free to share your opinion below 🙂