It might seem difficult for us to understand the ways and plans of God, and His love for us. He has already given us the perfect gift and sacrifice to have a fruitful life. We often see failed marriages and broken relationships, and we are not here to dig all those issues. But we are here to know more about the guidelines our loving father has given to establishing godly homes. The truth is that He has given us the word to exercise in our lives and experience the saving grace in our families, relationships and so on. As young wives, we all struggle to be the best and to do our best. And we have hope because the word of God says all things are possible for those who believe (Mark 9:23). And if we believe…we could build godly homes through obedience.
Before going deep, shall we say a small prayer together.?
“Dear Lord, as we come to your throne of grace, we surrender all our doubts and hurt feelings at your feet. We admit that we cannot bear any fruit without you, and we need your divine guidance to handle the responsibilities you have given us. Help us, Lord. In the name of Jesus, Amen.”
Tools and Tricks to grow in Love
Never stop saying that you love Him
How to give life to those three little words – “I love you” when it is always done as a practice? Or do you still mean when you say it? Why not put some extra efforts to make it more vibrant and meaningful?
You might have enjoyed saying you love him those days when you were actually behind him, loving him so much, and adored him as the love of your life. Do you still experience those precious moments in your life now?
If not, why? What could be reasons that draw you too far away from him?
Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers over all wrongs. (Proverbs 10:12)
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. (1 Corinthians 13:4-5)
So, to grow in love, and to mean that you love him, it is essential to have no record of the wrongs and to increase in Christlike love to our husbands.
Tip 1: Forgive as Christ forgave you and have no record of wrongs.
Cook His favorite food
This might sound silly, but it is one of the special ways to win the heart of your man. There is a quote that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Why I love this because it gives me the privilege to show my husband that I love and care for him.
But there is a condition before anyone try to practice this tip.
“Better a dry crust with peace and quiet than a house full of feasting, with strife.” (Proverbs 17:1)
The word of God says first we need to have a peaceful and quiet house without complaints, nagging, murmuring, and the great list of our uncovered expectations before setting up his favorite meal.
Tip 2: Set your house in peace mode before making his favorite meal.
Let him know that you are trying to be the best wife for him
Remember you get excited when he tries to satisfy your expectations for your favorite gifts on special occasions. In the same way, he is overjoyed seeing you try your best as a wife, mom, and anything for the happiness of your family.
For instance, it is easy for us to say “this is the way I am” or “I cannot change” but the truth is that we can do anything if we trust God and His work in our lives.
“Everything is possible for one who believes.” (Mark 9:23)
All we have to do is search the scripture, and get the guideline for that particular situation in our life. We have an excellent father who has provided us with everything we need. All we have to do is seek it, and those who seek it earnestly will surely find it. (Mathew 7:7)
So, how can you show him that you are a new person? Or anything that you have changed? What could be the visible manifestation of a loving wife?
It must be increased tolerance level and zero nagging 🙂
Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife. (Proverbs 21:9)
And it is, even more, sharper in another verse…
Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and nagging wife. (Proverbs 21:19)
A quarrelsome wife is like the dripping of a leaky roof in a rainstorm; restraining her is like restraining the wind or grasping oil with the hand. (Proverbs 27: 15-16)
So, after reading all this, what do you think?
Hope the scripture portion conveyed the message to your heart…
Tip 3: Make him know that you are trying to be the best wife for him.
Tip 4: Ask him suggestions for any improvements to be made as a wife. But don’t nag him by asking too much 🙂
Don’t wait for him to help you
Sounds hard, right! Getting rid of our expectations can seriously work wonders in our marriage. It is great if someone helps us, and allow us to take a break. But it might not happen always, and even can lead to serious arguments.
Either you can have a list of tasks for which you need his help and a gentle request that could trigger him do that for you.
“Through patience a ruler can be persuaded, and a gentle tongue can break a bone.” (Proverbs 25:15)
The Bible says a gentle tongue can break a bone. Try this trick, instead of nagging him, and making him repulsive with the list of complaints.
Tip 5: A gentle tongue is powerful.
Never say No when your husband takes the initiative for fun
Sometimes we expect too much but gets nothing. Or sometimes our partners’ interest might be completely different, and again disappointment… And you know what could be the end result.. 🙂
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. ” (1 Corinthians 13: 5-7)
So, the LOVE according to the bible is patient, kind, humble, selfless and patient. And if we say we love our husband, follow this rule, to love him wholeheartedly.
If you follow this golden rule and tame yourselves for the glory of the Lord, our God will shower His love upon your marriage lives.
I am not saying without practicing, and I am experiencing the love of God upon my marriage life, and the best I could do is to share this truth will my fellow believers…
Tip 6: If your husband takes the initiative with any fresh ideas, grab the chance and have fun.
If you have a fight or an argument, reconcile soon!
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. (Ephesians 4:26)
When two people live together, mistakes are part of it. And sometimes, those mistakes might carry away the happiness. But when things happen, we should not let it turn off our joy. If we end up quarreling, first we are disobeying God, and then our husband. So, the moment we feel remorseful, ask the Lord for forgiveness and strength to move on. If you are not ready to reconcile with your husband, keep that in prayer, ask the Lord for the power and then reconcile, confess your sin, and ask forgiveness.
Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. (James 5:16)
Whenever we argue, I make it a point to reconcile soon, or at least before bed. And if my ego tries to control me, I will ask strength to Lord in prayer, and confess my mistakes to the Lord. Then I ask sorry for my mistakes to my husband and also ask him to pray for me to God as I believe he has authority over me.
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord (Ephesians 5:22).
Tip 7: “Sorry” means so much, and a gentle hug can do wonders.:)
Never be the reason for others to look down on your Husband
According to scripture, the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God. (1 Corinthians 11:3).
There may be moments in our lives when we feel like vent out the frustrations. It is good to share with friends or parents, anyone who could advise or help you with suggestions. But always remember not to belittle your husband with them.
The only way to avoid this tendency is by following the golden rule in the Bible, “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets (Mathew 7:12).
Would you like your husband discussing you to others???
So, decide 🙂
Tip 8: Never belittle your husband before others.
Hope you enjoyed reading this, and we have to thank God for giving us the scripture for our life, better discernment, and living. We all learn by making mistakes, and if you make a mistake… you still have a chance to learn from it.
Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will.